Parenting today is both rewarding and immensely challenging, a reality reflected in recent discussions by CBC's Cross Country Checkup. In response to questions about the most stressful aspects of raising children, parents from across Canada shared their experiences. Their concerns ranged from navigating generational differences in parenting styles to managing a fair division of household responsibilities and dealing with feelings of isolation. As the U.S. Surgeon General warned, the mental health toll of parenting can be significant.
Modern parenting has grown more demanding, both financially and emotionally. Data shows parents today spend more time with their children than previous generations, despite the increase in dual-income households. The shift toward emotionally attentive parenting, while beneficial in many ways, has contributed to burnout. Alyson Schafer, a parenting expert, observed that today’s parents face an overwhelming array of responsibilities, noting, “The level of specificity, the number of things that parents have to pay attention to, has become overly inflated.”
The Importance of Community Support
The concept of the “village” to help raise children has diminished in many modern communities, adding to parental stress. Some, like Genevieve Gee from Vaughan, Ontario, are fortunate to have close family and community networks to lean on. “I think that’s something that a lot of families are missing,” she said, describing the support she receives from nearby relatives and local resources. However, many parents today find themselves isolated, lacking the communal support that studies suggest is essential for both children’s development and parents' well-being.
Research published in Developmental Psychology emphasizes that children may thrive in environments where they receive care from multiple adults. This evolutionary perspective underscores the importance of shared caregiving, yet modern social structures often leave parents to manage the demands of child-rearing largely on their own.
Unequal Division of Labour
Despite some progress in gender roles, the division of household labour remains unequal. Fathers today spend more time with their children than in previous generations, yet mothers still shoulder the majority of unpaid work, including chores and child care. A 2022 Statistics Canada report highlighted this imbalance, which contributes to stress, particularly for women managing work and family responsibilities simultaneously.
Easing the Parenting Load
The stresses of modern parenting reflect broader social changes and challenges, from economic pressures to the decline of community support. While some parents navigate these challenges with the help of strong networks, many face the realities of isolation and unequal responsibilities. Addressing these issues requires a collective effort to create support systems, ensuring that both parents and children can thrive.
Picture: Two parents multitasking (Designer)
