When children misbehave, many parents turn to threats or bribes as quick fixes, according to a national poll on children’s health by the University of Michigan Mott Children's hospital. One in four parents of children aged three to five reported threatening their kids with no Santa or gifts, while more than half said they used bribes like treats or rewards. Although these tactics might work momentarily, experts warn parents about relying on them for the long haul.
“Empty threats, however, undermine trust and credibility and aren’t usually effective. Positive reinforcement and consistent discipline are more likely to shape long-term behavior,” said Dr. Susan Woolford, co-director of the Mott Poll. Many parents admitted to struggling with consistency, though, citing exhaustion, frustration, and a desire to avoid public tantrums as common barriers.
The Importance of consistency and tailored approaches
Consistency is a critical element for effective discipline, yet nearly a quarter of parents admitted that in the heat of the moment, they react emotionally or forget strategies. Dr. Woolford highlighted the importance of planning ahead and using unified approaches to avoid giving their children mixed messages.
Discipline strategies should also be age-appropriate. For toddlers, distraction and redirection work best, while preschoolers benefit from logical consequences. For example, if a child spills a drink in anger, having them clean it up helps them connect their behavior with its outcome. Woolford noted, “Consequences should be immediate, so the child understands the connection with their misbehavior.”
Sources of guidance and the role of experts
Parents often rely on family, friends, or social media for discipline advice, but fewer than 20% consult healthcare providers. The poll also revealed that one in eight parents had not given much thought to their discipline strategies, and some reported using methods like spanking, which experts link to aggression and defiance in children.
Woolford stated that discipline strategies should be appropriate for the child’s age and developmental level, adding, “As children grow, their responses to discipline will also change, so parents should adapt their strategies and stay open to new approaches.”
Laying the groundwork for positive behavior
Discipline should help children learn responsibility, self-regulation, and the difference between right and wrong. While threats and bribes may provide short-term results, they can undermine trust and fail to teach meaningful lifelong lessons. By focusing on consistency, logical consequences, and positive reinforcement, parents can encourage better behavior while building their child’s self-esteem.
Picture: Toddler in the naughty corner (Designer)
