Snowplow parenting has grown more common in recent years. Experts say these parents remove social, academic, or emotional challenges to prevent their kids from struggling or failing. Psychologist Caitlin Slavens, co-founder of Mama Psychologists, explains that technology and social media have fueled this trend, increasing pressure on parents to ensure their children succeed.
Unlike helicopter parents, who step in when problems arise, snowplow parents take it even further. They get rid of challenges before their child ever faces them. Tamar Z. Kahane, a clinical psychologist and director of The Kahane Center, explains that these parents try to protect their children from experiencing any struggles at all.
This approach may seem beneficial, but it can actually cause more harm than good. By eliminating struggles, parents risk reducing their child’s motivation, weakening problem-solving abilities, and making it harder for them to handle stress. Slavens emphasizes that challenges are essential for growth, and parents should allow children to make mistakes and learn from them rather than clearing every hurdle in advance.
Instead of removing every challenge, experts suggest healthier ways to support a child’s development:
Step back when challenges arise
Let children solve their own problems instead of immediately intervening. For instance, you can pose guiding questions such as, “What do you think you should do?”
Be a guide, not a plow
Offer emotional support without removing obstacles. Encourage kids to work through difficulties at their own pace.
Recognize the value of struggle
Ashley Harlow, a licensed child and adolescent psychologist at Children’s Nebraska Behavioral Health, says “The most important advice I would offer is to recognize the benefits of distress. Overcoming a challenge, rather than removing it, allows a child to build resilience, problem-solving, coping skills and confidence.”
Letting children experience setbacks isn’t easy, but it’s necessary. Instead of viewing obstacles as threats, parents should see them as learning opportunities. Allowing kids to struggle and find solutions on their own helps them grow into capable, confident adults.
Picture: Snowplow parenting (Designer)
